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Aaaaaand war.

January 19, 2010

A reader of mine e-mailed me yesterday to get an update on the NYEG situation. Specifically, he asked if I “went all Romeo and Juliet” and started dating him anyway.

The answer is yes. Yes, I have.

After stewing in my anger and hurt for a while, I continued to talk to NYEG on the phone every night. I realized that I was unable to stop speaking to him without feeling enormous quantities of anger and hurt, so one way or the other, someone was going to be hurt. The situation had already progressed to a point where that was inevitable. NYEG and I were already too invested in each other when BFF’s sister got up in arms about it.

I tend to be rather good at rationalizing how to get the things I want. In this case, I performed a cost/benefit analysis. If I were to stop communicating with NYEG, I would be hurt, NYEG would be hurt, BFF’s sister would be normal, and there’s a chance everyone would end up alone. If I were to continue communicating with NYEG, BFF’s sister would be hurt, I would be much, much happier than normal, NYEG would also hopefully be happy, and perhaps we would even find love.

Call it selfish if you want. It might be. But that’s my thought process.

My main concern was how BFF would handle it. After spending the whole long weekend with her, she’s come to see that I’m crazy about NYEG. She thinks it’s unfortunate that her sister won’t drop it, but she hopes she will. I’m sure she will eventually. In the meantime, things might be uncomfortable, but it’s nothing we can’t manage. Nothing our friendship can’t survive.

NYEG is coming to see me this weekend.

And he’s already asked me out for Valentine’s Day.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. January 19, 2010 2:24 pm

    Oh, I am so glad that your friend has come around! It was a terribly unfun situation to be in, and I’m glad that things seem to be much more “sunshine and roses” than last time you posted.

    And a Valentine’s Day date? Woo-hoo!

  2. January 19, 2010 3:41 pm


  3. January 19, 2010 4:39 pm

    yay! it turned out how i hoped it would! you and bff seem to be doing great, you and NYEG have hit it off (plans for valentines? woo-hoo!) and maybe bff’s sister will learn you can’t control everything in life and you need to let the past go.

    so, yay! also, i’m really good at rationalizing any situation to get what i want. it’s a gift.

  4. Elizabeth permalink
    January 19, 2010 5:25 pm

    Can’t blame ya. Cheers!

  5. January 20, 2010 9:51 am

    Yay! And you already have a date for Valentines?! That’s great! I’m engaged and he hasn’t even asked me to be his date yet! Or maybe now it’s just implied…. oh, this engagement thing is complicated 🙂

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